Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
