Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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