HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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