he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize