he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Randomize
