If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
