I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
