I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
