I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize