HIV tests are more positive than that guy
please come you make the beer taste better
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Randomize
