Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I just forgot I was standing up.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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