I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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