i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
