thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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