yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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