shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
