I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
