When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I think a kid would responsible me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize