Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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