Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
