Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize