I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
