theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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