what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
