Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
