I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
