She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize