Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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