i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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