I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
