And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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