so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
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I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
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Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
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