Don't you send me to vm
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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