I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
