btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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