omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
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