I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
