weddingsv make me drug and hornr
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
