Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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