I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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