Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
