i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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