I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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