very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Randomize
