I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
ttyl tear gas
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
