I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
