Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize