Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
