At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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