Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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